Kahapon muntik na akong masagasaan ng jeep. Patawid ako sa may Kamuning, huminto na yung isang jeep para padaanin ako, nung paungos na ako at palagpas sa jeep, may nagovertake naman, ika nga nila, na face to face ako with a possible ending to my life.
Mabilis ang jeep na nagovertake, ilang saglit lang kaharap ko na siya. Ako naman huminto sa pagkilos at nanlambot. Malambot, naramdaman ko kung papano ako kayang ligisin ng jeep na yon, kayang kaya ikalat ang katawan ko sa kalsada.
Buti nalang. Gumalaw ako, umiwas at nakaligtas.
Pagdating ng hapon, alas sais na, pauwi na kami dapat. Hindi pa siya nagtetext. Nakailang text na ako. Tumawag, cannot be reached. Kasabay ng kaba ng dibdib ko ang pagharurot at pagalingawngaw ng ilang truck ng bumbero na dumaan mismo sa tapat ng opisina. Ang mga kasama ko, nagsitawag na sa kanilang pamilya, inaalam kung ayos lang ba sila. Ako, ang taong mahalaga sa akin, cannot be reached.
Pag-uwi ko, matapos ang dalawang oras na biyahe, bukas na ang ilaw, nandon na rin ang mga damit niyang suot suot kaninang umaga, hay salamat po at okay siya, pero walang sumasagot sa mga katok ko, taning ang aso lang na hindi naman ako mapagbuksan. Sinubukan kong tumawag ulit, may sumagot na, nanginginig ang boses ko, umiiyak na ako.
Bago ang araw na ito galit ako sa kanya, dahil sa mga ka-text niyang babae. Ganon siguro pag mahal mo ang isang tao, nung sinagot na niya ang tawag ko at nalaman kong nasa tindahan lang pala siya bumili ng load matapos makapagcharge sa bahay, ang saya ko, ang saya ko ding niyakap siya nung magkita na kami.
Kung nagkataon, nasagasaan ako nung umagang yon, kung nagkataon, building nila yung nasabugan. Sa isang iglap, maaaring mawala ang lahat. Naisip ko noon, dapat pigilan ko ang aking sarili sa pagmahal sa kaniya, dahil sinabi naman na niyang paulit ulit na hindi pa niya kayang magmahal uli, pero papano, papano kung isang araw maligis ako ng sasakyan, papano kung isang araw tuluyang hindi ko na siya ma-reach. Kaya mamahalin ko siya ng buong kakayanan ko, simula ngayon at sa bawat segundong magkasama kami.
Friday, March 13, 2009
Tuesday, December 16, 2008
Holidays from the crypt
I'm a sullen Zafra mode right now. This is the worst Christmas party since Grade 1. And I'm a whiny bitch.
Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Printing Operations Manager Needed
An offset printing business based in Antipolo is looking for a Manager.
Please send your resume to marketing@adrienmultimedia.com or msrelayson@gmail.com
Thanks guys.
Please send your resume to marketing@adrienmultimedia.com or msrelayson@gmail.com
Thanks guys.
Monday, November 10, 2008
Tuesday, October 28, 2008
Confound it! Nah, compound it.
Okay, so I wake up today with a hideous credit rating. I've emailed my card company and told them I'm canceling and will be making arrangements to pay off my balance.
And then I thought, this is crazy, I can't do this for the rest of my tax-paying life. If I can afford, so the gov't says, to give 20% of my yearly hard-earned pay to the gov't as taxes, then I hope to Midas that I can pay myself 10% annually. Ok, so there's that. I realize I was writing my resolutions in advance.
Anyway, 10% annually is not that bad. Hmmm. Well, from zero, no from negative, to 18,000 savings a year is definitely not bad. But I'm a dreamer and a slacker, so I want to retire by age 50, as in not lift a finger by age 50 type of retirement. That's 18,000 * (50-24) = 468,000. If I plan to live another 30 years after 50, then that's a mendicant living of 1,300 a month. Not very much worth living for.
So I get all boiled up and crazy, searching the web for solutions. Tah dah! Mutual funds! For a very can do away with amount of 5,000 initial investment and succeeding 1,000 deposit every now and then, you can earn an annual average of something a little over the inflation rate, let's say 11.8%. That's important because inflation rate means your peso today is worth dust in ~12 years, if the rate is 8%.
Ok, so on the first year that's 5,000+(1,000*12)=17,000*(1+11.8%)=19,006!!! On the first year you've earned 2,006, which you can withdraw minus the rate (around 3%) that the bank or the processing company charges for withdrawals. Anyway, let’s cut the math, I’m not even sure if it’s precise, although it was fun figuring it out. On the 22nd anniversary of your investment, you would’ve become a millionaire, it would have grown into 1,075,224.66, and over the course of those 22 years, your total withdrawals would be 824,273.66. If I’m 24 by January, plus 22 years, I can retire by age 46 ^_^
But let’s say I get a raise and I can afford NOT to withdraw the monthly earnings. I just keep depositing 1,000 every month and forget about it. Well, that makes me a millionaire by the 21st anniversary of my investment, a whopping 1,121,427.46
Ok, maybe I did the math a bit wrong but the whole point of it is, 5,000 initial investment and 1,000 every month… Come on, that’s less than what we pay for taxes! I say if we can give the gov’t 20% of our pay, we can give ourselves 10% back each month. It’s not as instant as winning our first million on a game show, but neither is it as embarrassing nor as having such a statistically low probability and it’s definitely worth it. And if a writer can figure this much out, so can you.
Green-Collar Jobs, I want one, but where do I sign up?
from http://www.greenforall.org/green-collar-jobs
What Are Green-Collar Jobs?
Background
What’s the best way to give Americans of all socioeconomic backgrounds a tangible stake in fighting for issues like global warming?
Easy: Make it their livelihood. Every day, about 135 million people go to work in the U.S. Imagine what would happen if millions of those jobs—plus new ones created for people who are currently unemployed—were in fields like renewable energy, sustainable agriculture, and green building.
Our two crucial concerns about survival—the environment and making a living—would be combined. A person’s commitment to their job would also be their commitment to the planet. We're developing a clearinghouse full of resources, case studies, and tools from people all around the country who are working to implement green-collar jobs. Explore it: www.greenforall.org/resources For a more detailed overview of green-collar jobs, read: www.greenforall.org/resources/green-collar-jobs-overview |
Monday, October 27, 2008
Ok, I'm relenting. I'll retire by 50.
Your XX000.00 current monthly income will be Php 34380.00 after 17.00 years at inflation of 5% a year. The 34380.00 a month is Php 412560.00 in a year. You should have a net retirement fund (after 17.00 years) amounting to Php 4125600.00 that earn not less than20.00% per annun to give you Php 34380.00 a month or Php 412560.00 in a year to sustain your current lifestyle without working.In order to have that retirement of Php 4125600.00, you need to start saving Php 38946.25 a year or Php 3245.52 per month for the next 17.00 years at a rate of 20.00% per annum.
If I want to retire by 40, according to Colayco
Your XX000.00 current monthly income will be Php 34,380.00 after 17.00 years at inflation of 5% a year. The 34,380.00 a month is Php 412,560.00 in a year. You should have a net retirement fund (after 17.00 years) amounting to Php 4,125,600.00 that earn not less than 20.00% per annum to give you Php 34,380.00 a month or Php 412560.00 in a year to sustain your current lifestyle without working. In order to have that retirement of Php 4,125,600.00, you need to start saving Php 38,946.25 a year or Php 3,245.52 per month for the next 17.00 years at a rate of 20.00% per annum.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
I'm not buying fire.
The first I heard of a fire sale was in a movie, an action movie, a franchise action movie.
The first time I've read a comicbook (ok, ok graphic novel) that centered on a market crash is Wood and Donaldson's Supermarket.
Then I got my hands on an American Civil War book called Banished Children of Eve which also revolved around a market crash, gold versus greenbacks, and yes, you guessed right, greenbacks won.
Anyway, earlier today I read about a Black Sunday on Wall Street. Not knowing what a Black Sunday is, I went on and clicked the link. And this was what I read:
Lehman Brothers (NYSE: LEH), the 158-year-old firm that managed to survive the Civil War, the Wall Street panic of 1907, the crash of 1929, the Great Depression, and a handful of bond-trading scandals, hedge-fund collapses, and market panics, has filed for bankruptcy -- the largest bankruptcy in history. Attempts to line up a last-minute sale over the weekend crumbled as front-runners Bank of America (NYSE: BAC) and Barclays(NYSE: BCS) decided a Lehman takeover deal wasn't feasible without government backing.
And all I've read and heard about market crashes and what not, came rushing into my mind. Came crashing into my mind, actually. I'm broke, bankrupt, beyond saving and it's eerily comforting, a fire sale, I mean. Or a crash.
It feels like a storm coming, a cleansing, a baptism, Of fire.
Or maybe this is just a plot running rampant in my mind. I better write it down.
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Friday, July 11, 2008
Wednesday, July 9, 2008
Looking for a new blog site.
And a new notebook. Yes, this is a case of the medium affecting the message. And no, that is not just adspeak.
First of, for a writer, or at least someone who claims to be, my output is pretty slim. My technique hasn't blossomed but has in fact withered to crumbs. My entries are either rants or ripped from other sites. And my notebook is on its last pages but unfortunately what fills it is not worthy of any sort of publication.
So I am prepping myself for a more prolific month ahead, I want to say year but I'll be strict with the deadline and say that next month I would have at least one output a day or write at least 500 words to finally get some more pages into that novel that's been in the bin at the back of my mind.
With that goal, I'm looking for a cleaner, much less chubby-on-the-edges type of blog site. A format that stimulates sharper thinking and longer output. If I'm honest, I'll tell you I'm growing out of the cuteness of Multiply.
I've moved a lot. I hope this next move means my muse will move in again with me.
Friday, June 20, 2008
Old, yes, but fascinating.
I am fond of second hands. Books, clothes, houses, stories, people. Pre-owned, pre-loved, hand-me-downs, used.
I week ago, with money not enough to last for the week, I found a second hand bookstore and couldn't resist adopting a few books. Just two actually, drawing the line on an Adrian Mole book, it was big but so was the price and I had to consider whether or not I wanted to walk all the way to the office for the rest of the work week. But I got Joan Didion's White Album and Jamaica Kincaid's Lucy. Happy and giddy and 70 pesos poorer, I went back to the dorm for at least four nights quiet and curled up in my lower bunk bed.
Today I'm wearing a little black bubble dress bought from a second hand clothes shop. I paired it with black stockings and my old and worn at the edges white wedge shoes.
I'm an expert mover. I've lived in dorms, boarding houses, friend's houses, boyfriends' apartments, parents' houses, rented rooms, studio-types. All with traces and sometimes scars of its previous occupant. Whispers of stories reverberating and untold within its walls.
I've written nothing much and yet I claim to be a writer. But I can tell you borrowed stories, stories that other people and other beings in my dreams have lent me. I do not know if I wish to create, perhaps it's such a chore if not at all becoming less possible as centuries grow old and tales tell themselves over and over, spilling from people's minds, coated with thin newness.
I look years beyond my real age. Old, yes, but I strive to be as fascinating as my second hands. A lived life, a story told, pre-loved, pre-owned.
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Modern Chinese Proverbs
Virginity like bubble, one prick, all gone.
Man who run in front of car get tired.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
Man with one chopstick go hungry.
Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.
Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth.
War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Foolish man give wife grand piano, wise man give wife upright organ.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok.
Man with one chopstick go hungry.
Man who scratch ass should not bite fingernails.
Man who eat many prunes get good run for money.
Baseball is wrong: man with four balls cannot walk.
Panties not best thing on earth! But next to best thing on earth.
War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.
Wife who put husband in doghouse soon find him in cat house.
Man who fight with wife all day get no piece at night.
It take many nails to build crib, but one screw to fill it.
Man who drive like hell, bound to get there.
Man who stand on toilet is high on pot.
Man who live in glass house should change clothes in basement.
Man who fish in other man's well often catch crabs.
Man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Crowded elevator smell different to midget.
Saturday, May 17, 2008
My latest pin-up boy: Oscar Pistorius
My boy made it to Time 100: Most Influential People in the World. Oscar Pistorius
When I was learning how to climb mountains as a blind person, I had a lot of encouragement from experts. But after I summited Mount Everest, these people weren't ready to accept what I had done at face value. Some said I must have cheated; one even claimed I had an unfair advantage: "I'd climb Mount Everest too if I couldn't see how far I had to fall."
Similarly, when Oscar Pistorius' lower legs were amputated at age 1, few would have banked on this South African challenging world-class sprinters. At 20, when he began to close in on an Olympic-qualifying time for the 400 m, experts posited that his times were so good, he must have been getting an un-fair advantage from his bladelike prosthetics. When he set his sights on the Olympic Games in Beijing, the International Association of Athletics Federations (IAAF) ruled he couldn't compete against able-bodied athletes. An IAAF-initiated study found that more energy is returned to Pistorius' upper legs from his blades than from ankles and calf muscles and that he uses less oxygen.
Pistorius, 21, is appealing, on the basis of studies with differing results. It was only recently that living with prosthetic legs was seen as a huge impediment, but he has turned this perception upside down. He's on the cusp of a paradigm shift in which disability becomes ability, disadvantage becomes advantage. Yet we mustn't lose sight of what makes an athlete great. It's too easy to credit Pistorius' success to technology. Through birth or circumstance, some are given certain gifts, but it's what one does with those gifts, the hours devoted to training, the desire to be the best, that is at the true heart of a champion.
Weihenmayer is the only blind person to conquer Mount Everest
Wednesday, May 14, 2008
Investing In Your 20s
OK, you've graduated with a pile of debt from student loans, and you're making real money at a real job for the first time in your life. Retirement seems as distant as the Himalayas, but now's the time to get started. (No kidding.)
Get The Facts
Some of your friends may attempt to extend adolescence by going to graduate school to study arcane subjects. But if you're out of school, you've learned life's basic lesson: You're on your own, and everything is up to you. Devote your studies to the beauty of the 401(k). Read up on taxes. You can't plan without information.
Make A Plan
Your stylish friends will hoot, but develop a written retirement plan. Set goals and determine what you need to achieve them. The plan will change over time, but without a goal and a blueprint, it's easy to do nothing--and nothing will get done.
Start Saving
Consider setting aside 10% of your gross pay each month. Stupid-proof contributions to your 401(k) by making them automatic. This means you won't have to run to the bank each month, and you can't spend the money foolishly. You'll soon discover that it's easy to adjust your expenses to meet available cash.
Stick With It
Once you've set up a 401(k), don't tinker with the automatic contributions and don't borrow against it for a glorious trip to Europe with your sweetie. Keep an eye on your investments and broaden your study of investing. It's positive feedback: The more you know, the easier it is to learn more--and you'll make better investment decisions.
Burgeoning Gut
Shocking but true: The 28-inch-waist jeans you wore as an undergraduate may be tight in your late 20s. So, work on keeping your gut under control and that other peril of youth, debt. Many young people run up huge credit-card debts. This is stupid--check the interest rate. It also delays putting money aside for retirement.
Don't Count On Uncle Sam
The world has changed since the 1930s when Social Security was created. People live longer and will spend more time in retirement. The Baby Boomers will break Social Security, or force it to be changed beyond recognition. That means you can't depend on government programs in retirement. It's up to you.
When you want the most of your money
When you get your first "real" job:
Start a savings account to build a cash reserve.
Start a retirement fund and make regular monthly contributions, no matter how small.
When you get a raise:
Increase your contribution to your company-sponsored retirement plan.
Invest after-tax dollars in municipal bonds that offer tax-exempt interest.
Increase your cash reserves.
When you get married:
Determine your new investment contributions and allocations, taking into account your combined income and expenses.
When you want to buy your first house:
Invest some of your non-retirement savings in a short-term investment specifically for funding your down payment, closing, and moving costs.
When you have a baby:
Increase your cash reserves.
Increase your life insurance.
Start a college fund.
When you change jobs:
Review your investment strategy and asset allocation to accommodate a new salary and a different benefits package.
Consider your distribution options for your company's retirement savings or pension plan. You may want to roll over money into a new plan or IRA.
When all your children have moved out of the house:
Boost your retirement savings contributions.
When you reach 55:
Review your retirement fund asset allocation to accommodate the shorter time frame for your investments.
Continue saving for retirement.
When you retire:
Carefully study the options you may have for taking money from your company retirement plan. Discuss your alternatives with your financial advisor.
Review your combined potential income after retirement and reallocate your investments to provide the income you need while still providing for some growth in capital to help beat inflation and fund your later years.
excerpt from: http://www.wachovia.com/misc/0,,143,00.html
Monday, May 5, 2008
ALCOHOL BAN
I am putting myself under lifetime alcohol ban after totally conking out at Cathy's birthday party last Saturday. Suffice it to say that the party lasted until 3am but I only remember the events until about 11.30. Beyond that, I was probably in some alcoholic's limbo, swishing in my own puke.
So please, if you don't want me to sock you in the head, don't ever put an alcoholic beverage near me. EVER. I'll go rabid and bit off your knickerboxers, I swear.
Monday, April 28, 2008
Blocked
The day does not begin, does not peak, nor does it end between these white walls. It just remains to be. A stale entity, an overbearing presence, a necessary white demon perched on your shoulder describing a path you'd rather not travel today, or probably ever.
But I do not see the walls, not white walls at least, but grey, steel, colder, closer walls. Pricking my skin, tattooing colors inhuman, injecting previously rejected memories, preventing movement, confining stories.
Within these steel rectangles pressed upon my back, my face, my appendages, my mind wanders, alone, within itself, testing every step from one grey crumbling lobe to another. Skeletons of past thoughts, devoid of meat and meaning, tumbleweeds like quips and wisps of ideas, flee my mind, and is left, and leaves without any story, not even a string of words, in tow.
Hoy dia luna dia pena
hoy dia luna dia pena
hoy me levanto sin razon
hoy me levanto y no quiero
hoy dia luna dia pena
hoy me levanto sin razon
hoy me levanto y no quiero
hoy dia luna dia pena
the moon owns today, mourns today
wake up today without reason
get up today without desire
the moon today is owned, mourned
hoy dia luna dia pena
hoy me levanto sin razon
hoy me levanto y no veo
por ahi cualquiera solucion
arriba la luna ohea...
hoy me levanto sin razon
hoy me levanto y no veo
por ahi cualquiera solucion
arriba la luna ohea...
today, moonday, sad day
today i get up without reason
today i get up and don't see
no other solution
the moon rises
hoy dia luna dia pena
hoy me levanto sin razon
hoy me levanto y no quiero
hoy dia luna dia muero
arriba la luna ohea...
hoy me levanto sin razon
hoy me levanto y no quiero
hoy dia luna dia muero
arriba la luna ohea...
today, moonday, sad day
today i get up without reason
today i get up but don't want to
today, moonday, deathday
rise, o moon
Song by Manu Chao, poor translation by me.
This is exactly how I feel right now. A heavy sick evil weighs me down.
Monday, April 14, 2008
Thursday, April 10, 2008
April falls on Boracay
Just got back from a 3-day company planning in Boracay. How cool is that. No really. It was fantastic. Although, admittedly, it would have been better sans 30 pounds, but still.
Day 1.
Classroom day!
We left our bags in our hotel's front desk (Two Seasons) and then proceeded to the conference room of Pearl of the Pacific. We were broken up into 3 teams, played Pinoy Henyo, and then brainstormed for new projects. Everyone was surprisingly productive, probably because the beach was but a few meters away and we all wanted out of that classroom fast. But the excitement of Bora didn't prevent us from extending time to accommodate the ideas that we had. Uh-huh, we went overtime brothers and sisters! Imagine that. That's dedication and passion for y'all.
Day 3. Team-building
We started early, as in 8am early, and that's for people who usually get to sleep at 8am, if we're lucky. But who's going to complain? The earlier we open our eyes, the more we get out of Bora. We rented out a boat for island hopping, personally, swimming with all those fishies was the best part. I ditched the floaters early on because it only helped to choke me. And I became a happy little Ursula swimming with the little fishies. What fun! Then we went on to an -un-fun place, Pukka Beach. I can't, for the life of me, think why that would be the end part of the tour, we got ripped off even, their prices were 25% more than d'mall, and all there was to see was a small patch of rugged beach and sticks and grass structures. Really now.
Then we went back to the hotel and regrouped. We were out on a hunt with 1k per team. The treasures were: 1 photo of a super sexy bikini-clad girl, the jologest Boracay shirt, pinakabastos na souvenir, best shake, cheapest sarong. Our team hooked up with a half-Scottish, half-Filipina bodaciuos babe, albeit a little bit drunk but still very kind and even hitched up her tiny cover-up for us. We got a shirt with a kid and dolphin, hello are you in Subic? From 150 I haggled the price of the sarong down to 120. We bought one watermelon shake, not from Jonah's. And got a dick-shaped pair of slippers, in crimson red. Perfect! And the winner is! Beauty and the Best! That's us. We won all the things the other teams presented, though we were apprehensive about the shirts, and the money they saved! Hooray!
Oh, and I scraped my nose off the very grainy wall of the hotel pool. Nuff said. Pictures later.
Day 3. Free day!
Beach day! We were in the water for half the day. Taught some of my officemates to swim. Saw this man crossing the length of the beach, breaststroke and thought I'd try it too. Happy! I did it! Next time I'm in Bora, I'm gonna try to breaststroke the length of station 1. Whee!
Then we had to leave. And the sucky part was the heat in the Caticlan airport.
But all in all, it was the best company planning I've had!
Three cheers for Y&R!
Day 1.
Classroom day!
We left our bags in our hotel's front desk (Two Seasons) and then proceeded to the conference room of Pearl of the Pacific. We were broken up into 3 teams, played Pinoy Henyo, and then brainstormed for new projects. Everyone was surprisingly productive, probably because the beach was but a few meters away and we all wanted out of that classroom fast. But the excitement of Bora didn't prevent us from extending time to accommodate the ideas that we had. Uh-huh, we went overtime brothers and sisters! Imagine that. That's dedication and passion for y'all.
Day 3. Team-building
We started early, as in 8am early, and that's for people who usually get to sleep at 8am, if we're lucky. But who's going to complain? The earlier we open our eyes, the more we get out of Bora. We rented out a boat for island hopping, personally, swimming with all those fishies was the best part. I ditched the floaters early on because it only helped to choke me. And I became a happy little Ursula swimming with the little fishies. What fun! Then we went on to an -un-fun place, Pukka Beach. I can't, for the life of me, think why that would be the end part of the tour, we got ripped off even, their prices were 25% more than d'mall, and all there was to see was a small patch of rugged beach and sticks and grass structures. Really now.
Then we went back to the hotel and regrouped. We were out on a hunt with 1k per team. The treasures were: 1 photo of a super sexy bikini-clad girl, the jologest Boracay shirt, pinakabastos na souvenir, best shake, cheapest sarong. Our team hooked up with a half-Scottish, half-Filipina bodaciuos babe, albeit a little bit drunk but still very kind and even hitched up her tiny cover-up for us. We got a shirt with a kid and dolphin, hello are you in Subic? From 150 I haggled the price of the sarong down to 120. We bought one watermelon shake, not from Jonah's. And got a dick-shaped pair of slippers, in crimson red. Perfect! And the winner is! Beauty and the Best! That's us. We won all the things the other teams presented, though we were apprehensive about the shirts, and the money they saved! Hooray!
Oh, and I scraped my nose off the very grainy wall of the hotel pool. Nuff said. Pictures later.
Day 3. Free day!
Beach day! We were in the water for half the day. Taught some of my officemates to swim. Saw this man crossing the length of the beach, breaststroke and thought I'd try it too. Happy! I did it! Next time I'm in Bora, I'm gonna try to breaststroke the length of station 1. Whee!
Then we had to leave. And the sucky part was the heat in the Caticlan airport.
But all in all, it was the best company planning I've had!
Three cheers for Y&R!
Thursday, April 3, 2008
Big is a celebration of small
Dream big, shoot for the moon, look up to the giant.
But do not lose faith in your smallness, in your beginning, in what you can do with the speck that you are occupying not even a dot in the universe's timeline.
I know I have a reason for writing this. An insight supernova'ed in my mind. But later, I'll tell you later.
But do not lose faith in your smallness, in your beginning, in what you can do with the speck that you are occupying not even a dot in the universe's timeline.
I know I have a reason for writing this. An insight supernova'ed in my mind. But later, I'll tell you later.
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
Monday, March 31, 2008
Too Gauche for Gucci
I remember a fuming thesis adviser storming into his faculty room and successfully popping several arteries and veins from his already nervous-as-hell students. He read, or heard, or watched from somewhere, I couldn't really recall how he got about this message, this was two years ago, but here: Celine Lopez and Tim Yap was declared literary icons because of their much-talked-about, and apparently much-read, columns in the Philippine Star. He said if that was the standard, why do we even bother with literary theories and endless nights of working out plots, character histories, etc etc?
We were certainly too gauche for Gucci and thankfully so. With rumors of ghost writers, cocacabana parties, and unpaid debts, you just can't charge too much to artistic license.
We were certainly too gauche for Gucci and thankfully so. With rumors of ghost writers, cocacabana parties, and unpaid debts, you just can't charge too much to artistic license.
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Finding your place in the sun
is not as easy as getting a tan. Did I just say that? Haha. I thought it sounded good. Anyway I just thought of letting my thoughts out of my crowded mind. I think they're bcoming a little bit crowded up there, not very insightful thoughts even, perhaps there were at first but you know the story of rotten tomatoes and perfectly plump and healthy ones stuck in the same basket right? So I'm just gonna write, anything and everything that I can snatch out of my thoughts, no editing, just a long blab. My right shoulder blade hurts like hell. Does hell hurt? Does it inflict pain or does it receive pain?
Well, that wasn't so bad, now I'm reminded of hell closing and again of Lucifer in a beach and his scars running parallel on his back, and him appreciating the sunset.
But my back intrudes on my thoughts again. It hurts! Like hell!
Well, that wasn't so bad, now I'm reminded of hell closing and again of Lucifer in a beach and his scars running parallel on his back, and him appreciating the sunset.
But my back intrudes on my thoughts again. It hurts! Like hell!
Tuesday, March 25, 2008
Poseur Extraordinaire Exposed!
The great pretender has run out of smokes and mirrors and has finally been caught in her own commoners skin. A failed expected polymath prodigy. A thousand and one much-a-do out of an empty barrel.
Now she just wants to go home, far back into her mother's belly.
Self-discovery is not recommended for sheep in mink fur.
Now she just wants to go home, far back into her mother's belly.
Self-discovery is not recommended for sheep in mink fur.
Monday, March 3, 2008
More than one cause for sniffling
I woke up with teary eyes and watery mucus freely flowing from my nostrils. Possibly from downing too much granma and c2 the night before.
I am ending my day donning a huge dunce cap. I am beginning to question my mortality in the advertising industry. Earlier I found myself browsing through the classifieds again, it felt rather like half-heartedly choosing a building plan for an ark; an anticipation for the worst, for literally the end of days. At least in advertising.
I've swallowed about 50 tablets of 500mg ascorbic acid, in quite reasonable intervals, with hopes of shortening the time of sickness. I can't afford to be absent, seeing that I might need to pay for that stolen iBook, plus the rent and utilities.
I've had a triple dose of ad blogs the whole day, hoping to hone my judgment skills on which ad would win and which ad would be downright humiliating.
All I want to do is go home and have someone take care of me.
Well, I can always get a dog.
I am ending my day donning a huge dunce cap. I am beginning to question my mortality in the advertising industry. Earlier I found myself browsing through the classifieds again, it felt rather like half-heartedly choosing a building plan for an ark; an anticipation for the worst, for literally the end of days. At least in advertising.
I've swallowed about 50 tablets of 500mg ascorbic acid, in quite reasonable intervals, with hopes of shortening the time of sickness. I can't afford to be absent, seeing that I might need to pay for that stolen iBook, plus the rent and utilities.
I've had a triple dose of ad blogs the whole day, hoping to hone my judgment skills on which ad would win and which ad would be downright humiliating.
All I want to do is go home and have someone take care of me.
Well, I can always get a dog.
Friday, February 22, 2008
Wanted: Magnanakaw ng Laptop
Caught in the act of thinking how to lift the laptop just in front of where he was sitting. The office's laptop. An iBook G4.We were volunteers in an event, you see, and lot's of guys were sewing dolls with kids and kids at heart, sitting on beanie bags. So this guy came in, sat on one of the beanie bags for some time, not once touched a thread, and just waited for the people to stop noticing him. Good thing we have a witness. Someone actually saw him take the bag with the laptop inside and leave with it. Too bad she didn't know he wasn't part of the volunteers. The damned guy just did a good job blending in.
I wasn't there when the laptop was stolen. I entrusted it in the care of someone else. Note to self: never ever leave anything valuable in another's hands.
Attached is the police report. Not that you'll understand the events, what with the kind of english the policeman had, but you'll know that this is real and not just stupid spam material.
Another thing you should know, The Podium doesn't have a security camera, at least they had none when the laptop was stolen on Feb 20, 2008. I hope they install some soon. Police dogs, no matter how well trained, just can't sniff out criminal intent.
Sunday, February 3, 2008
Akalain mo, si Mavic gumugulong!
Tama, tama ang basa mo kaibigan. Kagabi lang pagulong-gulong ako sa Macea at sa kung saan mang park yon na malapit sa condo ni Bennet. Salcedo park pala yun.
Napakasaya pala magLONGBOARD! Sa kung sino man sa inyo ang nakabasa sa isa sa mga una kong blog entry dito kung saan nagdadrama ako dahil sa hindi nga ako mapagkakatiwalaan sa kahit anong may gulong, pwes ngayon nadiscubre ko na may pagasa pala ako sa paglolongboard! Arrrrrh!
Salamat kay Fabo at Joey sa pagpapahiram ng boards nila. At kay Dante, Kat, Lao, at sa pinsan ni Fabo. Sila ang mga ka-jam namin sa skate.
Alas diez na ata noon, katatapos lang ng isang araw ng paghahanda para sa pitch, at maglolongboard na sina Joey at Fabo. Sa hindi ko malamang kadahilanan, niyaya nila ako. Eh dahil mga Diyossing ko sila, at medyo naintriga naman ako sa longboard nga na yan, jumoin ako. Siguro mga 5 mins akong tinuruan ni Fabo magpush-off, tapos medyo bumabalanse na ako, aba by my second hour, nakakaliko na ako! Fantabulous talaga. Pero nung nasa Salcedo Park na kami, medyo steeper yung slope kaya nung paliko na ako, hindi ko natantsa yung speed at distance, kaya ayun, sumemplang. Pero ang una kong hinabol, ang board! Haha. Walang pagpagpag sa katawan o check kung bakit mahapdi ang paa ko.
Napakasaya talaga niya. Winner.
Puro Ladera ang boards nila, Bomber, Purple Heart, Respect, at yung iba hindi ko na alam. Magseskate kami ulit later. :D Wala lang. And saya.
Napakasaya pala magLONGBOARD! Sa kung sino man sa inyo ang nakabasa sa isa sa mga una kong blog entry dito kung saan nagdadrama ako dahil sa hindi nga ako mapagkakatiwalaan sa kahit anong may gulong, pwes ngayon nadiscubre ko na may pagasa pala ako sa paglolongboard! Arrrrrh!
Salamat kay Fabo at Joey sa pagpapahiram ng boards nila. At kay Dante, Kat, Lao, at sa pinsan ni Fabo. Sila ang mga ka-jam namin sa skate.
Alas diez na ata noon, katatapos lang ng isang araw ng paghahanda para sa pitch, at maglolongboard na sina Joey at Fabo. Sa hindi ko malamang kadahilanan, niyaya nila ako. Eh dahil mga Diyossing ko sila, at medyo naintriga naman ako sa longboard nga na yan, jumoin ako. Siguro mga 5 mins akong tinuruan ni Fabo magpush-off, tapos medyo bumabalanse na ako, aba by my second hour, nakakaliko na ako! Fantabulous talaga. Pero nung nasa Salcedo Park na kami, medyo steeper yung slope kaya nung paliko na ako, hindi ko natantsa yung speed at distance, kaya ayun, sumemplang. Pero ang una kong hinabol, ang board! Haha. Walang pagpagpag sa katawan o check kung bakit mahapdi ang paa ko.
Napakasaya talaga niya. Winner.
Puro Ladera ang boards nila, Bomber, Purple Heart, Respect, at yung iba hindi ko na alam. Magseskate kami ulit later. :D Wala lang. And saya.
Tuesday, January 29, 2008
Look at me I'm 23, beautiful, a sight to see tonight
A little dress to draw the press
And I'll be leaving
All the rest behind
Well be pleased girl
If this is what you wanted
The whole world is watching you take the stage
What will you say
Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
I close my eyes imagine time
Will not forget
My sacrifice
I numb the ache and decorate
My emptiness
Stand naked in the light
Well be pleased world
If this is what you wanted
This young girl is everything that you made
What will she say
Aren't I lovely
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
The world goes home
The lights go down
My lipstick fades
Away
And do you want me cause
I am hungry for something that will make me real
Can you see me and
Do you love me cause
I am desperately searching for something
Real
--------
I've a snug feeling under all my soft belly fat. Now I can finally sing this song and mean it. Yes, including the beautiful part. But perhaps not much of the desperate. But maybe I am searching. And yes, for someone real. Happy snug feeling in mavsies tumtums. :)
Retaso Mo, Manikako!
I-raid na ang mga cabinet at ilabas na ang mga inaamag at di na usong t-shirt, puruntong at bacon briefs! Yang skinny jeans at slinky top na yan, never na yan magkakasya sa yo! At ang frilly top ay mawawala na sa uso! Ipamigay nalang sa Retaso Mo, Manikako! boxes sa Faculty Center ng UP Diliman or sa UP IS. Pwede ding sa Podium o sa RCBC Tower.
Sa ido-donate mong gamit, makakagawa ng maraming Manikako para ibenta para may moolah for free art workshops sa mga kids na kapus-palad. Matututo din silang gumawa ng Manikako!
Visit www.manikako.com for photos. At kung naexcite kang gumawa ng Manikako super cute, mag-volunteer na din sa website! Panoorin mo rin si Medyas, ang patapong medyas na nagbigay ngiti sa isang bata dahil sa pagiging Manikako niya!
Kaya, dali, baliktarin na yang cabinet na yan!
Sa ido-donate mong gamit, makakagawa ng maraming Manikako para ibenta para may moolah for free art workshops sa mga kids na kapus-palad. Matututo din silang gumawa ng Manikako!
Visit www.manikako.com for photos. At kung naexcite kang gumawa ng Manikako super cute, mag-volunteer na din sa website! Panoorin mo rin si Medyas, ang patapong medyas na nagbigay ngiti sa isang bata dahil sa pagiging Manikako niya!
Kaya, dali, baliktarin na yang cabinet na yan!
Retaso Mo, Manikako!
I-raid na ang mga cabinet at ilabas na ang mga inaamag at di na usong t-shirt, puruntong at bacon briefs! Yang skinny jeans at slinky top na yan, never na yan magkakasya sa yo! At ang frilly top ay mawawala na sa uso! Ipamigay nalang sa Retaso Mo, Manikako! boxes sa Faculty Center ng UP Diliman or sa UP IS. Pwede ding sa Podium o sa RCBC Tower.
Sa ido-donate mong gamit, makakagawa ng maraming Manikako para ibenta para may moolah for free art workshops sa mga kids na kapus-palad. Matututo din silang gumawa ng Manikako!
Visit www.manikako.com for photos. At kung naexcite kang gumawa ng Manikako super cute, mag-volunteer na din sa website! Panoorin mo rin si Medyas, ang patapong medyas na nagbigay ngiti sa isang bata dahil sa pagiging Manikako niya!
Kaya, dali, baliktarin na yang cabinet na yan!
Sa ido-donate mong gamit, makakagawa ng maraming Manikako para ibenta para may moolah for free art workshops sa mga kids na kapus-palad. Matututo din silang gumawa ng Manikako!
Visit www.manikako.com for photos. At kung naexcite kang gumawa ng Manikako super cute, mag-volunteer na din sa website! Panoorin mo rin si Medyas, ang patapong medyas na nagbigay ngiti sa isang bata dahil sa pagiging Manikako niya!
Kaya, dali, baliktarin na yang cabinet na yan!
Manikako
When I'm all excited about something, I can't quite start writing about it. Like now, I should just plunge in with my story but here I am rambling and not knowing where to start. So I'll just pull the first thought that comes in my mind and hope that you people can make some sense of it.
When Mt. Pinatubo erupted, our school, St. James College of QC, held donation drives. Hallways were lined with one-peso coins and nuns, or at least my memery telss me they were, would collect the coins in little sacks each afternoon.
In high school I transferred to Cotabato, where war refugees were a part of the demography, you had to wait for army tanks to pass by before you could cross, and your rich Chinese cousin gets kidnapped. It does sound bad but hey, my family and friends are there. I became head of a group called RYA for Religious Youth in Action and basically what we did was put up donation drives upon donation drives to help the deposed families of whatever calamity, and in that time there were quite a lot, that came by.
In college, I joined CYA, quite a coincidence really and a big part of the reason why I joined. It stood for Christ's Youth in Action and again I was out helping build a home with Habitat for Humanity, and teaching street kids basic lessons.
I am working now in a rather big advertising, I'm still crossing my fingers and hoping I'd do well enough to be regularized, but that's not the story here. The story is Manikako, a project my immediate higher-up is very much into. Manikako is the fund-raising arm of ArtHOC or House of Comfort Art Network. Check their very cool website at www.manikako.com. The goal is to raise enough money and materials to continue the free art workshops that ArtHOC hosts. The art workshops are for underpriviledged children, it aims to empower them through art. You might have heard about this or watched it on tv.
So, all this time I am wondering why I didn't take up social work. But maybe that's because you can always help no matter what you are. Can you imagine? Here I am, loving social work, loving art, loving dolls, loving children. And Manikako came along. Hah!
If you're interested, visit the website and sign-up as a volunteer. We sew dolls, talk to adorable children, ask for old clothes and sewing materials, have fun, laugh, and make other people and children laugh with us. So let's all make a brighter future, one doll at a time, one smile at a time.
When Mt. Pinatubo erupted, our school, St. James College of QC, held donation drives. Hallways were lined with one-peso coins and nuns, or at least my memery telss me they were, would collect the coins in little sacks each afternoon.
In high school I transferred to Cotabato, where war refugees were a part of the demography, you had to wait for army tanks to pass by before you could cross, and your rich Chinese cousin gets kidnapped. It does sound bad but hey, my family and friends are there. I became head of a group called RYA for Religious Youth in Action and basically what we did was put up donation drives upon donation drives to help the deposed families of whatever calamity, and in that time there were quite a lot, that came by.
In college, I joined CYA, quite a coincidence really and a big part of the reason why I joined. It stood for Christ's Youth in Action and again I was out helping build a home with Habitat for Humanity, and teaching street kids basic lessons.
I am working now in a rather big advertising, I'm still crossing my fingers and hoping I'd do well enough to be regularized, but that's not the story here. The story is Manikako, a project my immediate higher-up is very much into. Manikako is the fund-raising arm of ArtHOC or House of Comfort Art Network. Check their very cool website at www.manikako.com. The goal is to raise enough money and materials to continue the free art workshops that ArtHOC hosts. The art workshops are for underpriviledged children, it aims to empower them through art. You might have heard about this or watched it on tv.
So, all this time I am wondering why I didn't take up social work. But maybe that's because you can always help no matter what you are. Can you imagine? Here I am, loving social work, loving art, loving dolls, loving children. And Manikako came along. Hah!
If you're interested, visit the website and sign-up as a volunteer. We sew dolls, talk to adorable children, ask for old clothes and sewing materials, have fun, laugh, and make other people and children laugh with us. So let's all make a brighter future, one doll at a time, one smile at a time.
Tuesday, December 18, 2007
Evil Stepsisters, Witches and Letting Go of a Fantasy
Fairy tales happen but once upon a time and in a land far far away. When it comes knocking at your door, in this time and place, well, it's disorienting. The perfect prince in your doorstep. And there you are, a maid, in emotional or physical tatters. Hardly the beautiful princess-in-waiting, where with a flick of a twig, a change of costume and you're suddenly the fairest of them all.
When it happened to me, I had no fairy godmother nor could I talk to rats and birds and so I faced the prince in my scullery maid costume. I looked more like an evil step sister and now I'm not so sure if I read the casting right. But there we were, him and I.
I thought it was a fairy tale. We had our moments.
...
I thought I could talk about it now. But as it turns out, my metaphors are mixed up and I can't really go on.
Suffice it to say for now that for the longest time I thought we had something going but then I realized that it was all in my mind, my imagination, my dreams and at times, my nightmares.
So I'm finally letting go of the balloon's string. And I'm watching it fly away from me. Into the heavens, the stars, the celestials, where I thought I resided.
Fly away from me little wing. Fly towards the heights of your dreams.
Never come back. Because when you do, I might not be able to let you go. I might lock you up in a tower. Or maybe the scullery maid and the prince, maybe they could really have a happy ending.
But for now, go. I hope to never think of you again.
When it happened to me, I had no fairy godmother nor could I talk to rats and birds and so I faced the prince in my scullery maid costume. I looked more like an evil step sister and now I'm not so sure if I read the casting right. But there we were, him and I.
I thought it was a fairy tale. We had our moments.
...
I thought I could talk about it now. But as it turns out, my metaphors are mixed up and I can't really go on.
Suffice it to say for now that for the longest time I thought we had something going but then I realized that it was all in my mind, my imagination, my dreams and at times, my nightmares.
So I'm finally letting go of the balloon's string. And I'm watching it fly away from me. Into the heavens, the stars, the celestials, where I thought I resided.
Fly away from me little wing. Fly towards the heights of your dreams.
Never come back. Because when you do, I might not be able to let you go. I might lock you up in a tower. Or maybe the scullery maid and the prince, maybe they could really have a happy ending.
But for now, go. I hope to never think of you again.
Tuesday, March 27, 2007
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